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When is a lie a lie?
Posted By katie allison granju
Dr. Helen points to a NY Post piece indicating that we of the female persuasion tend to lie more often:
Barash interviewed 500 women nationwide who answered her Craigslist ads seeking females to confide what they fib about. Among her findings:
* 75 percent lie about how much money they spend. For instance, they sneak purchases inside their homes after shopping or hide the price tags.
* 50 percent harbor “mixed feelings about mothering.” One told Barash, “I look at these children and I crave sleep and free time. They wear me out and make me jealous of working women who have no children, no husbands.”
* More than 60 percent cheated on their husbands. A 32-year-old mother conducted her trysts while telling her trusting husband she was working late. Even in asking for a divorce, she withheld the truth: “I didn’t say I had fallen for another man. He was better off with my lies.”
But Dr. Helen then goes on to note - quite wisely - that this author’s definition of “lying” seems a bit off:
My sense is, this study is a bit biased to start with–come on, Craigslist? Could it be that the women answering an ad asking for lying women are a bit shady to begin with? I think a random sample of women out in the world might have been a better way of conducting the research. And the lies the author mentions such as cheating are certainly more than white lies, but mixed feelings about mothering or other conflicting feelings do not seem like lies, but rather, like,well…mixed feelings that people often have about their life’s decisions. If that’s “lying” I imagine we are all guilty.
Mar 3rd, 2008
